Feeling sad from time to time is common – I guess.
But then there are those times – and I don’t even know why – I feel unbearable sad.
Tears just could not show the kind of sadness that I feel.
Like a salty river stuck in my throat and a curtain of teardrops waiting in my eyelids.
A silent suffering hidden from the world – hidden behind cold eyes.
If only I knew the reason then maybe I could understand.
But thinking about why I feel so blue – is feeding into my sadness.
Show me a way out of here. Wake me! Shake me!
Rescue me from this dream I can’t wake up from!

If only I could tell you some time
when you give me the chance
and allow me to -
To tell you how much I love you
to explain why there is no reason -
no reason at all.
Like I’ve known you all my live
I feel so empty when you’re gone -
though you where never there.
I need you, just like you need me
without each other we are nothing -
nothing but incomplete.
Don’t you feel this desire in your chest
can’t you see what you’re without me -
a hopeless empty shell.
Fill me with your open heart
complete me with your soul -
let me be whole – With You.

I’m stronger than that, I don’t need you, and all I want is you to be happy. Focus. Talk to myself. Make myself believe it.
I wonder how naive you must be to believe that. Truth is: It hurts – deep down inside me.
What I hated most about that situation is that you made it look like it was my fault. Now I didn’t see it that way. After all it was you who suddenly showed me more affection then you used to show me. First it was just words but then you got physical. It wasn’t me who started that. I did want you as just a friend. However you gave me more than enough reason to believe there could have been more. My flesh was weak and breaking my resistance was piece of cake for you. You must have known that! After all I was desperate for love and closeness. You were so very lovely and you gave me what I yearned for so much – the feeling of acceptance and love by simply being who I was.
Finding out you used me to reassure yourself to find the courage and leave your boyfriend was the hardest part. And now you have the nerve to tell me that it’s not your fault that I fell for you.
You’ve got to be joking! (weiterlesen …)